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Jimmy Carter Wins Fifth Hokum! Font Size: 
By William S. Smith : BIO| 21 Dec 2020
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HOLLYWOOD (SatireNewsService) -- The Academy of World Political Humor Arts and Letters (AWPHAL) today awarded comedian Jimmy (James Earl) Carter the 2006 Hokum as the year's finest political comedian. Carter's record shattering fifth Hokum came against stiff competition from a highly regarded group of nominees.

In a statement accompanying the announcement of the award, Edith Steingehirn, President of the Academy, said, "what Jimmy Carter has accomplished with his book Palestine, Peace not Apartheid, was both comically brilliant and extraordinarily difficult. It has been an axiom of the Academy that present-day Islamic-Jihadist culture is quite beyond parody. After all, a society that teaches its children to kill with explosives strapped to their little bodies, which executes women because they have been raped and which promises young men a brothel in heaven if they commit suicide in a certain way has gone far past the most sublime exaggeration. Attempting to caricature such a culture has generally been thought to be both pointless and impossible."

Fellow comedian and dual-Hokum winner Bill Clinton explained, "Carter was taking a big risk by entering the Middle-East Inanity comedy genre. This field has been dominated by second rate-comedians such as Yassar Arafat, the 'Assad Family Comedy Act', the 'Saudi Royal Family Variety Revue' and members of the Sayyid Qutb vaudeville school. Not well known in the United States, these comedians have long been famous for using the same punch line for every joke, 'The Jews did it.' Jimmy Carter has adapted that cut-rate comic trope to his own side-splitting style."

Steingehirn continued: "Carter's particular comic insight in Palestine, Peace not Apartheid, was to deliberately reverse the moral standing of the characters. Israel, the only functioning, free democracy in the region becomes, in Carter's hilarious upside-down worldview, the pariah state. The societies that practice genuine sexual, religious and ethnic apartheid - not to mention corruption and terrorism on an unimaginable scale - are characterized by Carter as victims! This is comic genius of a very high order."

Carter's comic career is a story of almost continuous success since he burst on the political scene in the mid-1970s playing a clownish U.S. President while actually holding the office. These sustained performances earned him four consecutive Hokum awards. This unprecedented record has stood the test of time. No other individual comic has been awarded more than two Hokums during an entire career (though an organization, the United Nations, through its various committees and "peacekeeping" efforts has won seventeen Hokums). The only two-time individual winners include Richard Nixon, Herbert Hoover, Joe McCarthy, Neville Chamberlain, Bill Clinton, Kofi Annan and Jacques Chirac.

More recently, Carter has enjoyed success in his long-running, one-man variety show "Jimmy Carter, a Farce to be Reckoned With," in which he plays a completely flummoxed, self-aggrandizing, tyrant-supporting busy-body whose foundation takes money from - and acts as a shill for - a bevy of Middle Eastern and Latin American dictators.

Last year's winner and this year's first runner-up, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, expressed both gratitude to Carter for helping his career and dismay at his second place finish in the Academy vote. "I acknowledge Jimmy Carter's indispensable role in the creation of the long-running Mad Mullah's Murder, Mayhem and Misogyny Madcap (which won a Hokum in 1989 with its fatwa against Salman Rushdie) which gave me my start. But seriously folks, a holocaust denying conference in Tehran, Iran - attended by people who style themselves as serious scholars - isn't that one of the great comedic events in history. I even got Reuters to describe David Duke as an 'academic'!

Ahmadinejad's agent, the Ayatollah Khatami, himself a brilliant comedian (see TCS Daily - The Angina Monologues) said, "The Holocaust symposium is a burlesque that has only been approached by the United Nations in 2001 with its Zionism is Racism Conference and by lone, edgy and relatively unknown political comedians such as Noam Chomsky, Jesse Jackson and Cynthia McKinney. To present this year's Hokum to a mere scribbler as opposed to a man who, for the last year, has entertained the entire world, is an outrage. We blame it on the Jews."

Another party complaining about its failure to win the award was the House Republican Leadership. "I believe our willingness to abandon all our principles, give up on all our reform efforts and spend money like drunken Democrats should have been given greater consideration," said Tom Delay, former House Majority Whip and a wonderful comedian in his own right.

As usual, Carter refused to accept or acknowledge the award. "That is one of Jimmy Carter's great strengths as a comedian," said Steingehirn. "He always stays in character as the tedious, buffoonish, self-aggrandizing and sometimes even dangerous know-it-all who is actually willfully uninformed and not really all that bright. Notwithstanding his numerous awards, consistently maintaining this character for over thirty years has been his greatest accomplishment."

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